Before I get into it, I do want to spell out that I am very much into consensual sexual acts of all sorts. Key word is consensual. And most risqué acts are discussed ahead of time to make sure both parties are into it.
I’m also one to run like a bat out of hell if it’s not consensual, and I do not take lightly any kind of ignoring of the word “No” or forcing oneself on another (unwanted).
This makes last night even more confusing.
I met this guy at the bar. He seemed nice and so I went home with him, and his best friend who had her boytoy in tow.
On our way out the door, I stopped at the restroom. When I rejoined him outside, he had just started eating a cup full of peanuts and showed them to be bragging about his nuts. It was cute how he was doing it, but I’m allergic (like ER allergic). When I said I was allergic, he swung the cup behind his back, flinging peanuts far away from us behind him.
“Why are you talking about peanuts? You’re silly.” and then you could see the thought cross his face…
“This means no kissing right. I need to wash out my mouth.” For about an hour until he’d brushed his teeth and washed his mouth, you’d see his thought of kissing me run through his mind, and he would quickly move onto something else instead.
As soon as he got in my car (I was driving), he was all hands and it was heavily distracting me from driving. So I asked him to stop. He said no.
Since this is one of those “What you can’t be serious?” things, I wrote it off as him being funny.
Once we got to his place, he served drinks and we (just him and I) went into his bedroom for privacy. He started taking off his clothes so I followed suit. He walked over to where I was and began kissing my neck (he hadn’t brushed his teeth yet) and pushed me down on the bed. I still had my pants on, and he was kissing down my stomach and biting at my crotch.
So I started to stand up and say that I was going to take off my pants. He put his hand around my throat, gripped me solidly, and pushed me back onto the bed. I was about to complain, and he let my neck go.
So I tried to rise again. Again, with quick reflexes, he put his hand on my neck and gripped tighter this time, pushed me back onto the bed. I stayed that way this time until he moved away from me.
He pulled down the covers slightly so I took the hint that I was to get into bed. I removed my bra and he began kissing my breasts and then biting my nipples.. and then biting them harder. He did not stop until I yelled “ow” very loudly, and even then he took his time letting go.
It became quite clear that while I didn’t think he was actually going to hurt me (well not really, plus he was a small enough guy that I could overpower him if I wanted) the activities we’d be doing would be entirely his decision. I debated on whether I was fine with it.
He slapped my breasts. It was startling and I didn’t like it but it was over as fast as it began, and he’d distract me with something else or refuse to let me talk.
“I’ll be right back. By the time I get back, you’d better be naked.”
I joked. “Of course,” because I was already removing the rest of my clothes.
“I mean it. Not a stitch of clothing.” Then he walked out of the room. He didn’t come back for a while. I waited obediently naked under the covers.
When he did come back, he threw off my covers and inspected me quickly before starting in on my nipples again, and then kissing me.. and then starting to eat me.
There was no checking in with me on whether or not it was ok, he just did what he wanted. And other than the very sore nipples, I wasn’t really complaining. I was torn between shock and heavily turned on, so much so that I barely thought about my safety or what he’d want to do next.
He put on a condom and began fucking me at that point and his hands roughly treating my breasts with the random slap. Again, when I began to complain about it, he’d not let me talk.
A couple more slaps later, I finally had had it and told him no more slapping. I wasn’t being silenced.
“If you want to slap something, you can slap my ass.”
He turned me over and spanked my ass several times.
Then he asked me to ride him. I tried, but he’d gone soft. Too much drink I suspect because he passed out cold shortly after and snored like a freight train.
Had we discussed my preferences ahead of time, I would not be confused at all about this encounter.
It was literally the hottest one night stand I’ve ever had, and that’s even counting him passing out before completing sex.
However, we didn’t have safe words or any discussion of anything. So my brain is telling me I was assaulted, while my vag is trying to convince me to see him again.