It seems now with dating there’s this element of “charity” or philanthropy that is expected. It must be a part of growing up, as when I was dating in my 20’s charitable donations were… well unheard of.. probably mostly due to most of my friends being broke.
Now being out there dating, it seems there’s this part of your dating resume in which you get to show off how awesome you are by donating to Charity A, B, C and oh you can’t forget about D.
Here’s the thing. I don’t give to charities. I have now and then given to charities that I know do good work or that are local in need of help, but other than that I don’t give to charities.
Yes I’m a selfish SOB. I don’t feel guilty for not donating money to starving kids in Africa. I don’t feel obligated to send money to Unicef to divvy among it’s many different causes. I don’t join in the bandwagon of pretty much any charity. (Those few huge natural disasters excluded though.)
Instead, I look for ways I can help those around me. Being behind someone in the grocery line who can’t afford groceries, helping a friend through a rough patch, or supporting local businesses. Donating to struggling local actors or people I know who are trying to get to a place where they can be self-sufficient and possibly employ others. (Currently a friend of mine – struggling playwright/actor – is needing money to attend an important unpaid internship he was offered.)
It’s not glamorous though. I don’t get awards for my charity. I don’t get “Volunteer of the month” or “Grand Pooba of Contributions” that I can show others or put on my resume. Sadly when I meet these people I’m not sure what to make of it. They’re like alien to me.
Maybe it’s from being born & raised a small town “country” girl where there wasn’t a thing as homeless in town.. just people going through a rough patch or at the worst a drug addict who was doing it to themselves. Where neighbors threw together to help each other, the town against the world.. so to speak. (Actually when I was very young, our home burnt down. The entire town grouped together to provide us with places to stay, bedding, furniture, clothes, etc.)
I really only remember my parents giving money to one “charity”… the local church which we attended. So it’s not like I have much example.
This whole… giving to charities thing.. I understand it.. and yet I don’t.
Do you give to charity? If so, which one.. and be honest.. why? (and does giving money to charities turn you on or off in a partner?)