So last night I go to this social thing I’ve committed myself to going. Third night of social outing in a row, and I’m wanting to shoot myself so I can get out of going.
So I drag myself. I’m late because I put up so much resistance that I completely lost track of time.
I’m supposed to be there at 6:30.. the party went until 8pm. I show up at 8:15. I know I’m bad.
The party is still going, but I see absolutely no one I know. Then I see Mr Smoking Hottie. He’s married, but he’s great eye candy.
He introduces me to his friend, Ms Hottottie. She’s awesome and we hit it off. Next I’m meeting another woman Ms Short&Sassy… and we’re all having a good time.
Then I get the gossip. I would never in a million years deduced what was actually going on under the scenes.
Turns out.. Mr Sexy TechGuru isn’t happy in his marriage. I’d picked up hints that this was the case, but nothing out of the ordinary “My wife is irritating me today”.
New friend, Ms Short&Sassy is totally all about him and wanting to show him some happy. (seriously)
My other new friend, Ms. Hottottie was talking all night about this married guy that she is craving. She told me all about him and his wife. No one has ever met his wife. His life, kids etc. Supposedly he toggles between married and separated? Maybe an open relationship? He kissed her at the party… well in private anyway.
I assumed this was someone outside the circle or someone I didn’t know. Oh no.. this is a guy I know. A guy that I thought was just friendly.. now maybe not so much friends? All I know is that he’s hot enough to make me consider otherwise.
So.. anyway thats not all.
This engaged couple.. are all about to break up. Another couple are about to start dating… it went on and on.
Now I’m not sure what I’ve walked into. I am totally going to have to hang with Ms. Hottottie more often though. She’s a ton of fun. I may need to get some dating tips from her.
So after this party, I’m a little wired and I’d promised to go to a charity function. It was free and just a couple blocks away. I knew from the few of my friends that were going.. the people there would be rich and/or hot.
I was not prepared for it.
It was wall to wall smoking hot people. Hot men. Hot women. Those that weren’t hot were dressed in head to toe MOH-NEY. I felt like I’d stepped into a whole different universe, and while I was dressed appropriately… I felt like I should instead be in a revealing cocktail dress, decked out in diamonds and fur, and several sizes smaller.
I attempted to schmooze. A couple people were nice and social and not annoying, but most were completely brainless and completely superficial. I said Hi to the few friends who showed up, and then when I could no longer stand the vapidness and boredom I left.
Had I gone on a night when I was feeling more social I’m sure things would have turned out better, but as it was.. I was OMG GET ME OUT OF HERE.. and checked myself for hives as I ran out the door.
I will not be going to one of those again without a huge party of girlfriends or a millionaire on my arm.