Nov 072011
 

So it was day two of the long phone calls, and it didn’t start out pretty.  I have no idea why I was so tired but I was. I was tired, bitchy, and impatient.

 

The conversation was fine.. good for the most part.. but he kept setting off “red flags” … well not red flags really. It wasn’t like suddenly red flags were appearing out of nowhere and I was wading through sea of them.

 

It was more like the reality of who he is and what kind of person he was, finally hit me.

 

We talked a bit about music. Or should I say he talked. More often than not he talked in a way that was.. well… condescending or as if I couldn’t possibly have any idea what he was talking about.  Often he talked over me or wouldn’t let me get a word in edgewise.

 

This did not go over well.

 

It didn’t help any that the minute I mentioned I was attempting to write a book,… ok not “The Minute” but after the initial “That’s great”… he asked..

 

“Are you ready in the event that your book is a success?”

 

Seriously?? Like wtf kind of question is that? He then went on a tirade about how he’d done a tone of research on writing books and authors and what not, and how I needed to have all this legal stuff done, and agreements, and to watch out for shady book deals..  and suddenly..

 

Sails – wind = writers block. (as much as what he said may be true, it’s hardly his business at this point to shove his nose in let alone go on a tirade where I can’t get a word in.)

 

And.. as much as I like the idea that he’s not greedy, he’s a helper personality, and he’s ethical.. I don’t get the idea that he really gets that owning his own business, insurance, taxes and whatnot.. that what he’s currently charging isn’t really going to make ends meet unless he does work 10 hours a day 7 days a week, which he can’t do because he also needs to be out there doing sales and setting up appointments. He’s a one man business, and at his current prices he can’t even afford to hire anyone to help him with it.

 

This also set into motion a discussion of tech. I’ve mentioned before that he’s not tech savvy. He’s really really not tech savvy and absolutely has NO interest in technology. So much so that he’s pretty adverse to it.

 

He says he doesn’t judge people who use it or whatever, but I can’t imagine that he grasps the basic concepts of me (technophile). He doesn’t get email. I don’t even know if he has an email address as he has no way to check it. He has a website for his business that he hired someone to make, but I don’t think he’s actually seen it. He has no concept of social media, and is so adverse to being on it himself that he won’t even let me make a company page for him (for free) and maintain it (he wouldn’t even entertain the notion).

 

I even had to explain Hulu to him. Thank God that he knew what a DVR was, or I think I’d have just hung up right there. (I really try not to be a tech snob, but I really am I think.)

 

Other than singing and writing.. and even that I’m not sure about the singing thing.. we don’t have a damn thing in common.

 

Our family backgrounds… while both Christian-esque… thats as close to “in common” we get there. I’m from a “Leave it to Beaver” family compared to his.

 

I’ve had to explain several words to him, and yes English is his first language.

 

Then there’s the big secret thing that he won’t tell me about yet. He promises he will someday.

 

The conversation just didn’t really go well, and I’m starting to think that “friends” is all we’ll be.

 

He’s a nice guy and seems to be a very hard worker, and I think he’d probably make a good dad someday.

 

I’m just slowly coming to the realization that there’s a reason I don’t go for guys like him… I just haven’t quite put my finger on it yet.

Nov 062011
 

I managed to finagle .. as I generally do.. free tickets to a great social event taking place last night. I was pretty stoked.

 

So I did my normal.. take a shower… empty my closet of outfits one by one till I found one that I felt beautiful in… put my makeup on and pretend to style my hair.

 

All in all.. I thought I looked pretty good and I was ready to party.

 

So I go out to my car and head off.  I pull onto the side road for the highway, and I realize…

 

“Motherfucker.. my headlight’s out!”

 

I’m still cussing in my head, and trying to figure out if I can just keep going or not. Then I remember that my Texas inspection sticker (the mandatory once a year check you have to have done that says “this car is road safe”) has expired.

 

So.. if I get pulled over. I might can talk my way out of a ticket for the headlight, but I will get what I think is a $500 fine for the damn inspection sticker.  And cops always pull you over for headlights being out.

 

“FUUUUUUUUUUUUCK”

 

To say I was upset would be putting it mildly. I forced myself to drive home, park the car, and accept my fate as a homebody on a Friday night.

 

(See reliving it to type this, I get upset all over again.)

 

Ok, so I’m home and I’m pissed and I try to figure out what the hell to do so I don’t end up in some kind of massive pity party.

 

Should I ring up and annoy all my friends? Maybe one of them could take me to the party?  But dang I only had one ticket so they’d not be able to go. Dang it.  Do I desperately call everyone and ask.. “So whatcha doing?” in hopes that one of them is like me.. a lonely friday night loser?

 

Maybe I should just give in and open a bottle of wine and get drunk all by myself.

 

Uh… no I’m not that desperate… and if I did either of those, I think I’d end up being more depressed than I already was..

 

Then my eye caught the business card of “Mr. Said He’d Call But Didn’t” from my post “He’s everything I never wanted”.

 

Bored and Pissed off is never a good thing with me. I am liable to do some very rash things that I wouldn’t normally.

 

Since I was dressed as a She-Devil when we met, I was going to call him and say,”Do you know what happens when you don’t call the Devil like you said you would?”

 

I picked up my phone, and dialed.

 

Ring… Ring…

 

“Hello, this is CB.” Bastard answered. I was really hoping to get his answering machine. I listened for background noise to see whether or not he was doing something awesome and I was just that loser girl that called him with nothing to do.

 

“Hi, this is Maruska…”

 

“OOOOH Hi! How are you?” He interrupted excitedly, which totally threw me off guard.

 

“Umm I’m ok. And yourself?”

 

We spent the next 5 minutes awkwardly stumbling around the absence of anything to talk about. The gist of the conversation was each of us attempting and failing to sound like we actually had active social lives.. well actually any kind of lives at all.

 

Once it was clear that we were both in the same boat… bored on a Friday night.. we relaxed and started talking.

 

And talking…

 

And talking…

 

Conversation happened.

 

It was a good conversation. Nothing mind blowing, but just good get-to-know-ya conversation.

 

He apologized for not calling. Evidently there’s something in his life thats complicated, and it boiled down to him just being chicken.  The complicated he wouldn’t tell me about. He did promise that it’s not a wife or kids hidden somewhere, and he’s not killed anyone. (yet anyway – if he wasn’t coming highly recommended from a mutual friend, I’d have ran already)

 

He really is not computer savvy. Doesn’t even own one. (Yes, scared the crap out of me too) He’s afraid of social media sites. (even scarier) And doesn’t even know how to type.

 

Seriously.. he couldn’t be MORE of what I don’t go for.

 

On the upside, he claims to be a great singer. So that whole Von-Trap family thing, could possibly happen. We’ll see.

 

One hour turned into two.. two into four.. next thing I know it’s 5 hours later.

 

He also kept saying he needed to go.. but never went. One of those things.

 

We didn’t however do the whole “You hang up” “No, you hang up” “No you hang up” “You’re not hanging up” thang. But it may be coming.