But as I laid down to sleep, I started replaying the night. Normally when I go over to his place that late at night because he’s lonely, it’s straight to the bedroom. Get undressed. Cuddle. Maybe have sex. ok.. usually have sex.
Last night, when we finally come in.. I go to put my stuff in his room and figure he’ll be right in after me. He wasn’t. So I leave his room and he’s heading into the living room and straightening up the couch. Fluffing pillows.
We talk about something. I don’t remember what.
I hint-ask what we’re doing in the living room, because he doesn’t seem like he’s heading to the bedroom anytime soon.
He says, “I thought we’d hang out a bit. That’s ok isn’t it? Or do you want to go straight to the bedroom?”
The way he said “bedroom” you could tell he didn’t want to go there yet. So I said we could watch something.
The few (like twice) times we’ve attempted to watch something.. he was drunk.. and we didn’t watch anything. It was a rather quick segue into having sex.
But last night, we watched and had the movie not messed up and not played, we’d probably have finished it.
We snuggled on the couch watching the movie. Just holding each other. But once the movie messed up, he turned around and started kissing my breasts and we made out for a bit.
Generally this would have immediately led to the bedroom.
Last night, it stopped. He started talking about something. Or the other. Then he went to the kitchen. Offered me something to drink. Listed off everything he had on stock.
Then we went outside. We talked. He talked about his dreams of improving the backyard. What he wanted to do with it, etc. He talked about the neighbors and things outside his fence.
We came back in and sat on the couch again. He talked about various things.. his kids.. his baby mammas.. the girl he met who only wants him for a fling.. dating.. our past.. where we grew up.. what we wanted in dating (we both are looking for the same thing).
We made out some more. Nuzzling. Kissing. and holding each other as if our hearts would break.
He pointed out the photos he took. Talked about how he took them, his camera, the lighting, how they were printed.. talked about missing photos in one of his “family” frames and how he needed to get photos printed of his youngest child to put in there.
“I’m going to go retuck in my boy. Do you want to see him?” It was a question of a happy proud father, but I was still apprehensive. I don’t feel it’s right to meet someone’s kids until it’s serious.
“Do you want me to see your son?”
He replied something along the lines “If you want to” but I knew he wanted me to. So I did.
He was so sweet and gentle with his kid, and my heart nearly melted out of my chest. If I wasn’t smitten with him already, that would have done it.
Then we went to the bedroom. Got naked. Got into bed. He laid on his back, and I snuggled up next to him laying my head on his shoulder… just like he likes it (I like it that way too, so it works) with one of his arms wrapped around me holding me there.
We start to talk. He asks if I just want to cuddle or if I want to have sex. He doesn’t usually ask, he just usually goes for what he wants. I reply that I could go either way. He says he’d like to have sex. I say ok.
He rolls me over and climbs on top of me. We kiss… normal foreplay stuff.. but this time, he’s teasing me. He knows I’m ready to go that I want him, but he continues to not enter me.. just tease me.
Then he enters.. and as he enters.. it feels the same yet different. Something is different. I open my eyes and see him watching me. His eyes aren’t filled with lust or desire, there’s a tenderness there.
I raise my arms to hold his face between my hands, and I look into his eyes. He lowers himself to me, staying in me, still thrusting.. but his face is just a few inches from mine. We look into each other’s eyes.
We’ve never done it like this before. Never this intimate. I see something pass through his gaze.. a thought.. I ask.. he says nothing… but we both know he’s lying.
He moves closer to kiss me. I meet his lips half way.
He wants to look at me while we have sex. He wants me to look back at him.
My legs get tired (Thanks Jose) so I ask to switch up positions. We do doggy for a bit, but it feels cold and empty.. so I switch it to riding him.
I don’t get a lot out of being on top. But he does. It’s intimate like it was when he was on top. We’re enjoying each other. He’s really enjoying it. Moreso than I’ve ever seen him before.
He can go for ages, but I finally get tired and get off him and lay down next to him and snuggle. He holds me and falls asleep. I start to move, he pulls me closer and kisses my forehead. I move my lips to his and kiss him gently. When he’s fully asleep, (he snores like a freight train) I get up. Pull the covers over him, put the pillows back on the bed. I kiss his forehead, and use all my control not to tell him “I love you”.
We weren’t fucking last night. We were having sex.. and part of it.. part of it, felt a lot like making love.