Feb 172010

Short Sheer DressIn light of DateDaily’s article about the guy who broke up with his girlfriend solely because she had too many partners…
I thought I’d do a confessional to scare off any and all would-be suitors. 
I just want you all to know… all you guys out there.. I’ve been with 40 men myself (around there anyway).
*pausing for you all to start the name calling and get it over with*
My marriage did not end because I couldn’t keep it in pants. I can. I went a whole 5 solid years of marriage abstinent out of respect for the marriage… and trust me.. I like sex. 
Yet, people are still assuming stupid things based on a number.
I have never had an STD, VD, whatever. I’ve never gotten crabs either. I’ve checked.  I do have Herpes simplex 1? The cold sore one. I got it from my mother at birth. Though I’ve never in my life had a cold sore. I’m always extra-safe as I do not and never have used birth control pills. (I know *gasp*, but funny how you mention you’re not on the pill how much more willingly guys don a condom)
Just so you all know.. Most of that 40 have been one night stands, whether I liked it or not. Some of those one night stands were first date sex where I really just went with the moment and he never called again.  Some were guys that I wanted to bed, but a relationship would have been out of the question. Some were just moments of drunken insanity.. like the time I slept with the lead singer of a band traveling through town. (He was hot, shut up.)
Since my ex left over a year ago, I’ve had 5 partners. Six if you count the guy who couldn’t get it up. Four of those within the first 6 months after. (yes, I like to get right back up on the horse)
Am I completely done with one night stands? Have I moved past that period in my life?  
For the most part, yes.  But that doesn’t mean that one of these times I might get carried away with some guy and just do what feels right in the moment.
I’m no longer the naive girl I once was, sleeping with men to win their love or to keep a relationship. 
I’ve grown up. I’ve learned. I know what I need. I know (for the most part) what I want.
And every notch in that bedpost has lead me to where I am now. Each notch is special.
So throw your stones if you will. It doesn’t matter to me.
I am who I am. Thats not going to change because you think I should be someone else.

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