I lost a follower today. Not someone who just got bored, but someone I really pissed off.
I’m torn between being relieved about this, and feeling sad for making someone so angry.
I’ve blogged about this person before in my post, “Communication Frustration“. Which he was fully educated that we weren’t getting along, and that I didn’t see us ever getting along.
Instead of keeping things distant and backing off, he’d go away for a few days then come back to say hi.. testing the waters. I’d be nice and reply, but not ask him anything. Nice but aloof. I just kept getting that “this is going to blow up in my face” vibe from him.
What happened today was just a matter of time. KA-BLOOEY!
Its been going on for weeks. He’s been messaging me asking how I am, telling me to have a good day, etc. Wanting to chat with me, and telling me how much he really enjoys chatting with me.. (My chats with him were nothing more than banal, so I could honestly not figure out how in the hell he could enjoy them, but ces la vie) I’ve been nice in my replies.
He really is a sweet guy. He’s just sweet in a way that makes me want to kick him in the balls. Seriously, I’d like to… which doesn’t usually make for a good friendship.
There are some “buttons” I have that he pushes. He’s attempting to be sweet and caring, but instead comes off to me as a condescending emotionally manipulative ass. Maybe I’m too sensitive, but as a matter of trying to make us communicate better with each other, I no holds bared told him whenever he hit a button so he’d know not to do it again. I might be a big bitch.
This particular blow up started from yesterday when I was on Twitter sounding off about getting kicked out of a tall people singles group because I’m too short.
I was angry. I was pissed. I was sounding off.
He writes: “I know you’re not really pissed off!“
Dear Men, if ever a woman says she’s pissed. Talks pissed. Shows she’s even remotely angry… DO NOT tell her how she feels. Actually, never ever tell a woman how she feels.. she’s likely to castrate you before your next breath. Serious.
I replied telling him exactly that just nicer. “Don’t tell an angry woman how she feels!“
He then proceeds to tell me that height isn’t really an issue. Rather than telling him what a fucktard I think he is for belittling my dating criteria and belittling my feelings on the subject, I merely reply that for me height is definitely an issue.
So today, he’s messages me a sweet good morning message. He really is sweet, if it wasn’t for his bad habit of condescending and belittling which I think is more bad form than reality, but its hard to say.
His message this morning: “Wanted to say good morning before you did! I hope you have a better day today! Enjoy hearing from you! Smile for me today, please! Lol 🙂“
I was all more than ok, until I was commanded to smile FOR HIM today. What am I a child? Do I owe him a smile? Should I just fake a smile because he told me to?
Now don’t get me wrong, I sometimes find a good “commandment” sexy. Like when you know I’m dead assed tired but I’m not in bed, and you say “Ok, get off the computer, Go To Bed. Thats an order.”… can be kinda sexy. But you also have to have earned that right. You can’t just be some stranger seeing me up late and telling me to go to bed, cuz my foot will find your ass.
So I reply: “Thanks. Good Morning. Btw I don’t smile for anyone. I smile when I feel like it.“
Him “Ummm ok gee just thought it would make you smile! Sorry geez!” (ok I kinda feel a little bad, like I’m beating a child.)
Me “I know you mean well. I’m just trying to teach you how not to push my buttons.“
Him “No offense, but it seems no matter what I say it pushes your buttons! Your right I mean nothing by it! Geez I’m sorry now I’m afraid to talk to u.” (this is probably a good fear for him. but still funny)
Me “Lol I’m just being honest.“
Him “Thats great but I think you take people to literale! Your the first persons that’s ever had a problem with me! WOW Thanks“
Me “Really the first person ever?” (totally do not believe that I’m the only woman who hasn’t wanted to shove her boot up his ass.)
Him “Yep! I’m pretty easy going and not hard to talk to at all a very good guy! But seems to you NOPE not so! I’m sorry I will just say hi and not care“
Me “K. Are these people you’re referring to online?” (people read differently offline, so maybe its just a media issue.)
Him “I‘m talking in person online etc! Pretty much you read into everything I say!” (its online, thats how its done.)
Me “Naw I don’t read into. I just have a very low tolerance for some things.”
Him “Well no offense, but maybe thats your problem! I don’t criticize or judge people I take them for who they are annoying or not! I’m not like that towards people.“
(he unfollows me here so I can’t reply in DM.. I’m also feeling a little judged here btw.)
Me “So I shouldn’t tell you when you’ve hit a button, you’d rather me just smile and nod?“
Him “Never said that just seems anything I say pushes your buttons” (yes you annoy the shit out of me, finally you catch on.)
Me “You do have that skill. But you’ve known that from the start“
Him “Nope not really! Think you have way to higher standards of people! You judge to much” (again with the me judgy? now you’re making me really not like you)
Me “umm or maybe you have bad habits of condescending behavior” (yes that was an intentional jab back. Bastard called me judgy)
Him “none whatsoever that’s you! Have a nice day! Please stop following me! Your nit a nice person after all.“
Now I’m not a nice person (seriously who thought I was?), but he went off on Twitter via his Posterous:
“Ya know I don’t understand why people judge one another! I’m not perfect nor am I god! So why do some people think they are more superior than others?“
I don’t know.. but kinda feels like the pot & kettle here.
So.. to sum up… Today I am a mega-judgmental bitch who thinks she’s SOOO superior.
The Upside… I now no longer have to deal with him. I just don’t like having people that angry with me. *sigh* I’ll get over it.