Sep 092009
 

I had the best vacation ever. Actually, it felt like the first real vacation I’ve ever had. It was the first vacation I’ve taken since the separation/divorce. The first vacation I’ve taken in years that didn’t include my ex or my family.

It was peaceful. It was fun. And best of all, it was completely drama-free.

No one sat on the side lines judging my every move. No one got in a huff when I couldn’t eat something or needed something special (I have food allergies). No one irritated me by condescendingly suggesting “You sure you can’t just eat a little?”

Since my food allergy discovery every “vacation” I’ve tried to make has been a complete battle, until this one.

I went to visit my long-time online/phone friend, Folder. We’d yet to meet in person, but we’d talked so often for so long that it honestly felt like just visiting an old friend. It was great, relaxing, and just go with the flow.

And when I insisted on taking over the cooking, he more than willingly let me. How freaking awesome is that?

In dealing with my ex and my family, any time I wanted to cook it became an ordeal of “What you don’t think I can cook?” or “You don’t think I can do it right?” or they took it as some other kind of insult or slight. But seriously, its just easier and more relaxing for me if I just fucking do it. I like cooking most of the time. I just really hate cleaning up.

And guess what!! Folder did all the clean up. Seriously was in heaven.

Then I went to visit another old friend of mine (an ex of sorts actually but so long ago an ex that well it doesn’t count) and his gf/wife. They as well were easy going and more than willing to hire me on as a cook. And they did all the clean up.

I went on this vacation nervous, and slightly scared. With the ex, everytime I mentioned something allergy he treated me like I was being overly dramatic and seeking attention… so much so that I was honestly scared he’d sneak something I was allergic to into my food. With my family, while they were more understanding, they also didn’t always think about things so food was russian roulette.

But I thought, WTF I need out of here and we’ll see how things go.

So despite being dragged to see dinosaur bones, a car show (I am SOO not about cars or dinosaurs for that matter), and Fisherman’s Wharf (for the 3rd time), I had a fantastic time.

I so love my friends. And I love the new hope I have, that life doesn’t have to be a battle ground of miserable. There can be peace, and it can be good. Very Good.

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